(WARNINGS: potential nsfw conversation?) text;

[villainously]

( so the pirate is definitely just trying to reach one person in particular, but those handy private filters? well he's not mastered those yet. so enjoy, entire hotel, a pirate and his inquiries.

because when a savior mentions, more than once, that she wants something? well, he's going to try and provide. he stole a bunch of hot chocolate to try and give her something good in a place that has so little to speak of, and this is really no different.

...well it's kind of different. he just doesn't know that yet. )

do you know what condoms are? you can look it up, can't you, in your book? I think that's how it'd be spelled.

do you suppose there will be any around this place, if I asked around?

( he has no idea what he's asking for, but hey. he probably wouldn't be that ashamed if he did. )

Comments

1?

[ingrantitude]

[And Ward is just - going to make this face]

2/2-- > Video;

[ingrantitude]

[There are very dark circles under his eyes but he's grinning.]

If we had public bathrooms I'm sure there might be some. You uh-

Did you mean to broadcast this to everyone?

Video;

[villainously]

( well, not as planned, but he's only passingly annoyed by it. more that it shows his lack of knowledge, than any degree of shame. he doesn't savior how little he knows about common place items. )

In the bathroom? Why are they kept there?

( and why does Emma want one... more importantly... )

1/2

[64th]

Of course I know what condoms are. Did Haymitch tell you to ask me? He's such an idiot

or you don't know what condoms are?

[64th]

[ she realizes belatedly that this was a message to everyone ]

Did you mean to post that publicly?

[villainously]

no, but a bit late for that now.

( apparently... filters are difficult, someone teach him filters. )

no, he didn't. do you know what they are or not?

text;

[advising]

Impressive, pirate man. Even I can't embarrass myself as spectacularly as you do.

[ yes, Emma may have mentioned you're a pirate, and it will never get old. Never. ]

Not sure there are some around. Should be focused on other things, but, to each his own. Guess you'll have to get creative.

[villainously]

( look he's not ashamed of being a pirate, in fact he's probably too proud of it. )

it was a simple inquiry, I don't see why it's embarrassing.
and yes, I've come to that conclusion.

( he might have liked to surprise her, and he'll still try, but if they don't exist that's sort of the end of it. )

[advising]

Don't think I want to know what you come up with.
And now the whole hotel knows you're on the hunt. Well done.

[ no surprises now, Hook, sorry. Haymitch is eternally amused. ]

Re: text;

[ingrantitude]

Hey, guy wants to get laid. I can't blame him. Still bears some thought. If we're going to be here for ...awhile.

[awhile being - a long ass time.]

[64th]

Got you thinking about it? ;)

[ Cashmere no. ]

text;

[advising]

A while, right. Let's encourage procreating in a Hotel that is determined to kill us all. Yes, this plan is foolproof.

[ it's said with love, of course, okay? they're battleship bros, they can be real with one another, right? ]

text

[sheriffing]

[Not video because there would be so much yelling.]

What the hell is this?

[villainously]

curiosity?

( it was supposed to be private... yet he doesn't suspect that's going to help him very much. )

[text]

[unpurify]

dude that is a MAJOR logical phallusy

[If you think he didn't type that out with a straight face, he definitely did.]

[villainously]

depends on what a phallusy is?

( who has the P encyclopedia? )

text;

[lesson]

don't know about rubbers mate, but i have anal lube

[villainously]

going a bit in the opposite direction but it's good to know
why on earth do you have that?

( yes, the pirate knows what lube is. at least he knows something. )

text;

[ukase]

So those previous 'fuck offs' were actually literal.

[Text]

[ukase]

You planning on doing the nasty in a place like this?

[villainously]

well, what I was planning is irrelevant, what else do we have to do around here?

[a_chipped_cup]

[She doesn't want to know why.]

Um...I have a dictionary...if you'd like to look it up yourself?

[villainously]

( so not going there with Belle, subject change! )

ah. is that like an encyclopedia?

video

[avengeme]

I think you've gotten the answers you need but thank you for making my week just a little better.

[villainously]

More answers than I realized I was asking for, but the post has been at the very least informative.